Friday, February 24, 2012
What Karate means to me. My Shodan assignment.
I look back to the start of my journey, where I’ve been and where I am now, and realize that along the way Shotokan Karate has taught me something very special. It has taught me to be kind to myself.
Karate is not a team sport, I cannot defer blame if my stance is too narrow, or if I forget where I am in a Kata; every mistake I make lands squarely on my shoulders and weighs heavily. I am my harshest critic, my own worst enemy and I will always strive for perfection, that’s who I am – I wear this trait on my sleeve.
Somewhere along the way, a wise man told me “Mistakes are a part of learning”, and although I’m sure I’ve heard that phrase many times in the past, this time I finally listened. I started accepting my mistakes instead of beating myself up over them. I learned it’s OK not to get things right the first time, or the second, or even the third. It’s OK not to be perfect – I now accept this, forgive myself and move on. Dwelling and obsessing over my imperfections only held me back.
To put it simply, Karate has enhanced my life.
It has provided me with many years filled with personal goals and challenges.
It has tested my patience (and as it turns out, I do have some - very deep down, who knew!?!)
It has also given me a real sense of pride in the commitment I made to myself to make it this far in my journey.
Karate is not a team sport, I cannot defer blame if my stance is too narrow, or if I forget where I am in a Kata; every mistake I make lands squarely on my shoulders and weighs heavily. I am my harshest critic, my own worst enemy and I will always strive for perfection, that’s who I am – I wear this trait on my sleeve.
Somewhere along the way, a wise man told me “Mistakes are a part of learning”, and although I’m sure I’ve heard that phrase many times in the past, this time I finally listened. I started accepting my mistakes instead of beating myself up over them. I learned it’s OK not to get things right the first time, or the second, or even the third. It’s OK not to be perfect – I now accept this, forgive myself and move on. Dwelling and obsessing over my imperfections only held me back.
To put it simply, Karate has enhanced my life.
It has provided me with many years filled with personal goals and challenges.
It has tested my patience (and as it turns out, I do have some - very deep down, who knew!?!)
It has also given me a real sense of pride in the commitment I made to myself to make it this far in my journey.
Zero.
Tonight is my grading.
Well, this is it. The day I have been focused on for months. The day I secretly wished would disappear from the calendar. The day I didn’t want to come, but knew was inevitable. February 24, 2012 has indeed arrived.
What am I?
I’m nervous. If I wasn’t nervous I’d be nervous so this is, I believe, a natural feeling to have at this point.
I’m excited. Excited to finally take my place on the floor and prove I have earned and deserve the rank of Shodan.
I’m nostalgic. I received my Brown Belt SO long ago, and it is as a Brown Belt that I feel I really began to learn Karate and appreciate the sport. Anything before that time, I look back and consider myself to have been a different person. I’ve grown a lot from the day I was given the rank of 3rd Kyu Brown.
I’m Proud. So very proud of myself for sticking with Karate and not letting my own frustration or busy schedule take away from that which I truly enjoy.
What am I not?
I’m not perfect. If I remember that throughout, I’ll do just fine.
Well, this is it. The day I have been focused on for months. The day I secretly wished would disappear from the calendar. The day I didn’t want to come, but knew was inevitable. February 24, 2012 has indeed arrived.
What am I?
I’m nervous. If I wasn’t nervous I’d be nervous so this is, I believe, a natural feeling to have at this point.
I’m excited. Excited to finally take my place on the floor and prove I have earned and deserve the rank of Shodan.
I’m nostalgic. I received my Brown Belt SO long ago, and it is as a Brown Belt that I feel I really began to learn Karate and appreciate the sport. Anything before that time, I look back and consider myself to have been a different person. I’ve grown a lot from the day I was given the rank of 3rd Kyu Brown.
I’m Proud. So very proud of myself for sticking with Karate and not letting my own frustration or busy schedule take away from that which I truly enjoy.
What am I not?
I’m not perfect. If I remember that throughout, I’ll do just fine.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
One.
One more day until my grading.
Something dawned on me today. I realized that I have been so consumed with the date and practicing for the test, that I really haven’t given much thought to what it actually means or the belt itself. I’ve tossed the words Shodan Grading around very loosely thinking only of the process and not the fact that soon I will remove my Brown Belt for the last time, and join the ranks of the people I have looked up to throughout my journey.
Tomorrow night I will be a Black Belt. I’ll let that sink in when it is finally around my waist, but for now the test is still a hurdle I must first clear - and with this nagging groin pull I'm not sure how high I will be able to jump over the hurdle, but I'll claw my way over it somehow.
When this is all over, my mind will certainly appreciate the rest. Tomorrow will be just another day – not ‘another day closer’.
Something dawned on me today. I realized that I have been so consumed with the date and practicing for the test, that I really haven’t given much thought to what it actually means or the belt itself. I’ve tossed the words Shodan Grading around very loosely thinking only of the process and not the fact that soon I will remove my Brown Belt for the last time, and join the ranks of the people I have looked up to throughout my journey.
Tomorrow night I will be a Black Belt. I’ll let that sink in when it is finally around my waist, but for now the test is still a hurdle I must first clear - and with this nagging groin pull I'm not sure how high I will be able to jump over the hurdle, but I'll claw my way over it somehow.
When this is all over, my mind will certainly appreciate the rest. Tomorrow will be just another day – not ‘another day closer’.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Two.
Two more days until my grading.
Time has gone by so fast. I remember when it was three months away, 96 days seemed like loads of time and now my counter says I have one day and XX hours. Makes my stomach hurt just looking at it.
I am not going to class tomorrow night so I can let my body have some rest before the test. I pulled another muscle doing those darned back kicks - I knew they were trouble! So, ice and heat have been my friend for the past 24 hours - so far its not been helping, but hopefully within the next day it will ease off. I'm guessing on Friday a few extra strength Tylenol will be on the pre-grading menu.
As of today, I'm feeling OK. I just have to get through it, that's all.
1.5 hours of my life is but a blip in time - although when I'm in the midst of it, I'm sure it is going to feel like a really, really, long blip.
Time has gone by so fast. I remember when it was three months away, 96 days seemed like loads of time and now my counter says I have one day and XX hours. Makes my stomach hurt just looking at it.
I am not going to class tomorrow night so I can let my body have some rest before the test. I pulled another muscle doing those darned back kicks - I knew they were trouble! So, ice and heat have been my friend for the past 24 hours - so far its not been helping, but hopefully within the next day it will ease off. I'm guessing on Friday a few extra strength Tylenol will be on the pre-grading menu.
As of today, I'm feeling OK. I just have to get through it, that's all.
1.5 hours of my life is but a blip in time - although when I'm in the midst of it, I'm sure it is going to feel like a really, really, long blip.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Three.
Three more days until my grading.
Tonight in class I intended to work almost exclusively on Bunkai with my partner because there are a few sections that still trip me up, so I felt I needed to practice them repeatedly in order to drill them in to my head. Well, things didn’t quite go the way I’d intended, as my partner rolled his knee and ankle during warm up, spent some time on ice and then went home. It's not looking too good, and I wouldn't expect him to assist me while injured, so there is a good chance I will have no Bunkai partner on Friday night. Things will be what they will be.
I wish him the best and hope for his sake that it is only a minor injury that will heal quickly.
I instead spent some time reviewing all of my Kata just to keep everything fresh, going over the grading list, working on my combinations and tweaking the dreaded Ushiro Geri (back kick). And that’s it.
This was my last official class before my grading. No more instruction, no more tips, no more guidance - I’m now on my own.
Tonight in class I intended to work almost exclusively on Bunkai with my partner because there are a few sections that still trip me up, so I felt I needed to practice them repeatedly in order to drill them in to my head. Well, things didn’t quite go the way I’d intended, as my partner rolled his knee and ankle during warm up, spent some time on ice and then went home. It's not looking too good, and I wouldn't expect him to assist me while injured, so there is a good chance I will have no Bunkai partner on Friday night. Things will be what they will be.
I wish him the best and hope for his sake that it is only a minor injury that will heal quickly.
I instead spent some time reviewing all of my Kata just to keep everything fresh, going over the grading list, working on my combinations and tweaking the dreaded Ushiro Geri (back kick). And that’s it.
This was my last official class before my grading. No more instruction, no more tips, no more guidance - I’m now on my own.
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